Saint of the Cable Box That Won't Reboot

Solemn canonization of the patron saint of all who have held the power button, waited through the agonizing reboot cycle, watched the loading screen blink, and discovered that absolutely nothing changed.

Each weekday at end-of-workday, a modern hagiographer canonizes one daily small American suffering — Saint of the Hold Music, Saint of the One AirPod, Saint of the Printer That Needs Cyan to Print Black.