Worms and/or Parasites (The SpaghettiOs Shanty)

On June 3, 2026, a lawsuit was filed in U.S. District Court for the Southern District of Florida. The plaintiff, Florida resident Mary Hubbard, alleges she purchased a can of SpaghettiOs at a Walmart in Okeechobee, served it to herself and her daughter, and discovered — after eating — what the complaint describes as "worms and/or parasites actively moving in the food." The contents, per the filing, "clearly depict worm-like organisms moving within the food product." The lawsuit names Campbell's and Walmart as defendants and seeks at least $75,000 in damages, claiming the product was "unfit for human consumption" and "adulterated under federal food safety standards." Campbell's responded that it believes the claims are "without merit" and intends to "vigorously defend against these allegations."

The only appropriate vessel for this news was a sea shanty — the genre built for sailors discovering something deeply wrong with their canned provisions in the middle of the ocean. The crew sings the complaint language with total conviction. "Worms and/or parasites" is the pre-chorus. "What do you do with a worm-filled pasta?" is the call. "File it in the Southern District" is the answer. Campbell's denial lands in the bridge like a foreman shouting back into the wind. Nobody on this ship is joking.

[Intro] Way-hey and up she rises Way-hey and up she rises Way-hey and up she rises Early in the lawsuit

[Verse 1] In Okeechobee, Florida, on a June afternoon Mary Hubbard opened up a can of pasta rings She served it to her daughter with a spoon upon the table And what she found inside would haunt the Southern District

[Pre-Chorus] Worms and/or parasites Worms and/or parasites Actively moving in the food

[Chorus] What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? Early in the morning! File it in the Southern District! File it in the Southern District! File it in the Southern District! Seventy-five thousand dollars!

[Verse 2] The complaint does clearly state the product was adulterated Unfit for human consumption under federal law The plaintiff suffered gastroenteritis and a parasitic infection The daughter got prescription medication for it all

[Pre-Chorus] Worms and/or parasites Worms and/or parasites Clearly depicted in the food product

[Chorus] What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? Early in the morning! File it in the Southern District! File it in the Southern District! File it in the Southern District! Seventy-five thousand dollars!

[Bridge] Campbell's says: without merit! Walmart says: top priority! Campbell's says: vigorously defend! Crew says: THERE WERE WORMS IN THE CAN!

Campbell's says: without merit! Walmart says: top priority! Campbell's says: vigorously defend! Crew says: THERE WERE WORMS IN THE CAN!

[Verse 3] They failed to inspect and test and maintain quality control They placed a dangerous product in the marketplace, ye see They failed to warn consumers as required under federal law Now face the honorable court of the Southern District!

[Final Chorus] What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? What do you do with a worm-filled pasta? Early in the morning! Uh-oh, SpaghettiOs! Uh-oh, SpaghettiOs! Uh-oh, SpaghettiOs! Unfit for consumption!

[Outro] Way-hey and up she rises Way-hey and up she rises Way-hey and up she rises File it in the morning